“Professional appearance.” Two words that have silently policed generations of workers, dreamers, and creatives into conforming to a vision of acceptability that often erases more than it empowers. Behind the crisp lines of dress codes and vague expectations lies a deeper question: What happens when the way we dress becomes less about self-expression, and more about self-erasure?

There’s a difference between shopping and seeking. Thrifting can be a way of uncovering the layers of your identity, guided not by trends, but by your own intuition.

Thrifting intuitively means tuning into your curiosity, your memories, and your desires. It’s a ritual of listening.

There’s a voice that lives inside too many of us—it’s the one that whispers,

“Is this too much?”

Too shiny? Too styled? Too intentional? Too seen?

In a moment of doubt, I once typed the following into ChatGPT, “Am I shallow?” HOW CRINGEY.

I hit enter and waited a couple seconds for a response…

What unfolded was a deep reflection on how we confuse appearance with appearance-obsession, and how caring about how you show up is NOT the same as living for external approval.